Slips, Stockings, and Pin Curls

I feel like COVID has robbed us of our weekends. Although I had a busy day on Saturday I would have loved to be on the patio of a restaurant enjoying a drink. But I have made a conscious decision to do more social distancing. Some people really feel like these people have opened up the outside. People are still going to bars and crowded places like the Rona ain't out here looking for a host body. Sheesh!!! I have really made an effort to support black-owned businesses. So far the businesses I have patronized have given excellent service. They have worn masks and gloves and sanitize between customers. I went to get my nails done about three weeks ago. The lady doing my feet was very cordial and she did a good job. The guy that ended up doing my gel polish was acting a complete ass. I asked him not to cut my cuticles back like that because it makes them peel. He then proceeded to cut them anyway. He is having a whole ass conversation in another language and I am thinking I got to find me a black person to do my pedicure and manicure. I was thinking to myself my best nail tech was a black woman. I needed that Black Girl Magic

My cousin told me about someone she found. So I booked an appointment immediately. I had just come home from getting my nails done and I was making an effort to not give my money to somebody who doesn't give a damn about my nail health. Sometimes when we go to a BOB we expect them to be and do extra. I am always amazed at how people ask you who does your hair or nails and then they want to talk about how expensive they are compared to the shop where they yelling "Pick a color, Honey" before you get in the shop good. So back to my nail appointment. When I walked into the shop the vibe was so chill. It wasn't crowded. When it was time for my appointment it was just me and her and she took her time and gave me one of the best pedicures I have had in my life. I was happy to pay her price and give her a tip cuz Sis did that. When I left I felt uplifted, I felt light and I like to feel light. It is a blessing to hear people who are giving you services talk about how much they love what they do. I will definitely be going back.

I made a bold decision to stop drinking for 30 days, eat clean, drink a gallon of water a day, do at least 45minutes of cardio every day, and weight training 2-3 days a week. Some of you may be saying DAMN! But this stomach has got to go one way or another. I spent a lot of my day meal prepping for the upcoming week. I have issues with consistency so I have to go hard in the paint in order for me to accomplish my goals. So I decided to drink some tea and chill out. We are all struggling to find stuff to watch on TV. But, I noticed "The Women of Brewster Place" was on. I have watched the movie too many times to count. But, this time I noticed that one of the kids was Larenz Tate. I mean I had never noticed that before. This movie was made one year after I graduated high school and they were dealing with some deep issues. Looking at it this time I realized Mattie's son Basil had a lot of his daddy in him. The way Mattie held on to him trying to keep him a child ended up being his downfall. It also showed the strength we have as black women. The relationship between women was a constant theme in the story. From Mattie's momma pulling the shotgun on her husband to stop him from beating her child right down to sending her away because she didn't want her to continue to face the ridicule from her own father. Ms. Ella served as a mentor and guide but her own complicated relationships with men kept her from helping Mattie unpack all the pain she had experienced. Mattie was never able to forgive herself for getting pregnant and she was so afraid of losing Basil that she never pushed him to be a man.

I didn't even realize how before its time it was to have a lesbian couple in the movie. This is in 1989 when folks were still too afraid to reveal their sexuality out of fear. The homophobia of the black community was damaging to the couple. I mean the depth they went into to develop these characters was amazing. I know yall are like damn is she gone tell the whole movie. Welp, it's my blog so yup I just might. But the relationship with Melanie and her mom was so powerful. Cicely Tyson had a cold line when she said. " It hurt me when you changed your name because I named you after your grandmother who had 9 kids she raised to all grow up and go to college. And you had to look through an African name book to find a name that made you feel black." This is one of those times when I have been irritated by black folks who come from poverty, get an education a little change and a luxury car then all of a sudden they don't understand black people. TF you mean? Most of yall fronting asses are just two paychecks away from being homeless living way above your means. So many of us black kids with a past we have dare I say survived. We have to learn to forgive ourselves and not be trapped in things because we made a bad decision. Somehow we have become individuals all of a sudden. The Civil Rights Movement was not an individual movement. It was a community effort with neighbors and church members standing together while being sprayed with water hoses and having dogs sicced on them for us to have the opportunity to get an education and live in these gated communities. Yet we want to turn our nose up at people who are trapped in the hood. Those who are making a decision between bad, horrible, and the worst. I think this is the same mentality we have with BOB. Then some of us own businesses and feel like we don't need to provide folks with good customer service. Several friends have spoken to me about having to wash, blow-dry their hair before they go to the natural salon. Wait....what??!! Ms. Babydoll used to do my hair every two weeks, I would sit on a milk crate and get my hair washed, rolled and then tortured under the dryer until those curls were tight and bouncy. Cuz honey Ms. Shirley was not about that doing hair life. She got sick of hearing me complain about her and that straightening comb. I wonder can we get a class action settlement for all the times they burnt our ears and acted like they ain't touch us? Watching Mattie do hair reminded so much of my childhood when women would pin curl their hair. When my daughter was trying on wedding dresses the lady brought her a slip and she was like "What is this?" We don't even believe in stocking or slips anymore. They are dead to me. I can't remember the last time I actually put on a pair of stockings. I used to go and get a spray tan on my legs in the winter so my legs would look brown. Sisters, we have a rich history of women who have gone before us. They were badass women who ran all the shit. So as you approach this week just know we are complicated, complex...sometimes broken, bruised but at the end of the day we show up looking fabulous cuz honey Black Don't Crack. So this week do something that makes you feel light. Peace, Love and Hair Grease.