Must be Grace

It's been a long time since I wrote on this blog.....LIFE happens. I am in Charlotte, NC in my daughter and her boyfriend's brand new home. I am watching them plant flowers, listen to them laugh and reflecting on the day she was born. I was 23 years old and I had a whole baby. I was scared to death! I said to her when the crowd of family and friends left. I looked that little squinty eyed light skin baby with her little red nose and said, "I am your Mama I am sorry but, this is who God gave you. I hope I don't ruin your entire life." Seeing her at 25 years old doing things I never had the opportunity or the money to do. I see her in a good solid relationship with a man who loves and supports her. I can't begin to tell you how full of joy my heart is. It was a hard long battle but I can see how all of my sacrifices for her paid off. I want to cry but, I won't because she will be like "Ugghhhh Mom you are so extra!!!" LOL and she is right! The juxtaposition of this is one of my longtime dear friend's father is dying of Cancer. Watching her strength and the resolve she has is amazing. Seeing his courage to live out his life in the way he wants to live is inspiring. I hope I am as courageous when it is my time. Monday I will attend the Homegoing service of a former classmate and longtime friend Al Bee.

My friend Al Bee lost his son a couple of months ago to sickle cell anemia. They say the death of a child is extremely hard because it upsets the natural order of things. I can not imagine the pain and the broken heart of losing my baby. So my friend was heartbroken and then he had a massive heart attack and died. I am very sad but, I also rejoice that he is with his son. Watching our classmates and friends rally together to take care of things the family needs has been amazing. But, the thing we will miss about about my friend who we affectionately called Boogie is his authenticity. He was so authentically himself that wherever he goes he meets people and loves on them. You know the type of person who everyone thinks they are their best friend. Al Bee was that way. He will be missed!

The world lost Nipsey Hussle. Watching his Homegoing service helped me to know about how he lived. He was about building up his family, community and then impacting the world. The strength Lauren London had when she spoke about him showed us how he lived. The legacy this young man left will live on. I can say I know what it is to have a man that I learn from regularly. Bae is a leader and I have the pleasure of being in his essence and in his presence. He pushes me, inspires me, and the best part is how much he loves me. There are times our love can be so strong its almost too much for the two of us. I never imagined I would be loved in this way. But, God has been gracious to me. Now we are in no way a perfect. I have my moments and so does Bae. We disagree and we have conflict but, the good times outweigh the bad times. Next month I will celebrate my 49th trip around the sun. I am super proud of the woman I am. I look forward to celebrating the entire month. Yes! I am extra AF! I send out a birthday letter to my friends and family it has become something they look forward too. Over the years I have pruned this letter down to fewer people because I realize not everybody is in the mindset to celebrate you. Sisters! Take inventory of who is in your life. Take note of who has your back when it gets rough out here in these streets. If when you look around and there are folks in your circle who don't celebrate you, your accomplishments or your business....Get yo ass a new squad. Alexa....get me a new squad minus the haters. LOL!

So who are you celebrating? Who have you help reach their goals? Who are you mentoring? Who are you encouraging? We have to do it cuz we all we got! Peace and Hair Grease!

The game will test you but, never fold. Stay ten toes down. It's not on you its in ;you and what's in you they can never take away. Nipsey Hussle